How to divorce amicably

In this article, our divorce solicitors we take a look at the question of how to divorce amicably and the steps that can be taken to avoid confrontation and have an amicable divorce.

Messy, nightmare, and battle are all words used by the media to describe headline divorces. Matters are not helped by the current fault-based system which entices a blaming game. Having a divorce or separation does not need to be bitter. There are many ways to achieve an amicable divorce - and this can answer the question of how to get a quick divorce.

Going through a divorce or separation can be a highly emotional and sensitive time. The breakdown of a marriage or relationship will have an impact on both parties and any children. Especially when there are children involved, having an amicable divorce will help to build a foundation for being able to communicate in the future.   Focusing on the future can help you to work out what is really important to you. Having a good relationship with your ex-partner will be important for many, being able to attend important family occasions such as children’s graduation or weddings without animosity will make life a lot easier. 

The introduction of the no-fault divorce, or no blame divorce, due to come into force from April 2022 can only help contribute to removing the blame and conflict.

Amicable Divorce Checklist

What steps can you take to keep matters amicable?

• Honesty – honesty is key to maintaining an amicable relationship.  Being honest in all aspects of the divorce can assist, whether it is being open about your finances or your feelings.  If you are not honest about your finances, this will cause animosity in the long-term and lengthen the process. If you are struggling to deal with matters, matters would progress more easily if you are honest and explain that you need a little bit longer to deal with or process any information.

• Compromise – within divorce, there are no winners or losers. When you divorce you will often go from one household with two incomes to two separate households with one income. Often there is not enough assets or money to provide each person with the same standard of living. Therefore, compromise is key.  It is important to figure out what is most important to you for your long-term goals.   

• Communication - being able to communicate and have discussions between yourselves can prevent matters from becoming contentious and therefore keep legal costs down. 

How can a solicitor help you to achieve an amicable divorce? 

• Expert advice - obtaining initial legal advice can help you to understand your legal position from the outset and assist you in reaching a fair settlement. This means that will have a realistic expectation from the start.

• Mediation – mediation can be useful. There will be a mutual exchange of financial information from both parties. Mediators are often not legally trained and therefore, after exchanging financial information it is important to take legal advice. We can advise you on the parameters on a fair and reasonable settlement. 

• Reaching an agreement – if mediation is either not suitable or successful, we can help you deal with matters by way of voluntary disclosure and solicitor led-negotiations. Once an agreement has been reached we can draw up a consent order which is submitted to the court to dismiss all future claims. 

How can Holmes & Hills help ?

How to divorce amicably? At Holmes & Hills, our specialist family solicitors adhere to Resolution’s code of practice, this means we work in a non-confrontational way to assist you in resolving any family issues you may have. Working in this way can help to reduce conflict.

Keeping matters amicable and out of court helps you to achieve a settlement which is in your best interest. It also means that matters will be dealt with more efficiently and legal costs are therefore limited. This can alleviate what already is an emotional time by removing the additional stress of going through the courts.

If your marriage or relationship has broken down and you require assistance please book an initial fixed-fee consultation with one of our specialist solicitors. There is no obligation to seek further advice after your initial appointment. At Holmes & Hills, we are able to offer face-to-face, telephone, and Microsoft Teams appointments to suit your needs.